Take a Rest

It’s the first of a new month! Happy May Day!

Usually on the first of the month, I’m a busy beaver, setting my plans for the upcoming month, doing my month end recaps, and finishing up the monthly newsletter (Back Story – you can sign up for it here). I’m typically raring to go on a fresh, new month.

But, after a busy month with the A to Z Blog Challenge, and totaling the words I wrote in April (a record 81,291 – far surpassing my usual 25-40,000 words)…I’m beat. I’ve accomplished a few tasks on my daily To-Do list. But I’m not going to worry at the items that remain uncrossed off. I’m going to rest this afternoon.

Rest – It’s good for the body, it’s good for the soul.

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Z: Zone Out (Meditation)

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Z: ZONE OUT (MEDITATION)

I’m back at it, meditating, after an eye opener.

Yesterday afternoon, I sat down to work on an exercise about realizing my innermost dreams and setting intentions to meet my goals that are stepping stones to my dearest dreams. The first part of the workbook advised spending ten minutes in meditation before completing the exercises.

As I pulled up a singing bowl meditation on You Tube, to listen to during my contemplation, I realized how infrequently I’d been meditating over the past year. I went and pulled out my journals. When I’d meditate, I also journaled following the meditation time, which left me a good time stamp to follow. In 2012 and 2013, I was going strong, spending some meditating and journaling almost every day. Then I got to 2014 and 2015 where I came to a screeching halt. Months would go by in between my special sessions.

A memory surfaced about a conversation with a friend. Back when I was still regularly meditating, I’d told her how much better my life was, having this practice in it. I explained how things just seemed ‘to flow’. Life was smoother, less stressful, and opportunities and coincidences filled my life.

So I’m back at it. As of yesterday. I made a big sign and taped it up on the door in my writing room, to remind me.

So when I’m posting different A to Z techniques to destress and keep a smile on your face, meditation absolutely has to be in that list.

Meditation brings more benefits than merely reducing stress. Huffington Post has an excellent article, 8 Ways Meditation Can Improve Your Life. Their eight benefits are listed here. See their article for more information. (It’s a great piece!)

Meditation reduces stress.

It improves concentration.

It encourages a healthy lifestyle.

The practice increases self-awareness.

It increases happiness.

Meditation increases acceptance.

It slows aging.

The practice benefits cardiovascular and immune health.

And if you’re one that wants more scientific research about meditation’s benefits, see this article by Live and Dare, SCIENTIFIC BENEFITS OF MEDITATION – 76 THINGS YOU MIGHT BE MISSING OUT ON. There’s plenty of research to back up the claims.

Today I even got up an hour earlier than usual…on a Saturday morning! And I started the day with peacefulness and contemplation. Zoning out…sometimes it’s the best way to spend your time.

Y: Yoga

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Y: YOGA

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Yoga has moved from the woowoo realm of mystics and spirituality to mainstream America. Many small cities have private yoga studios now, even here in Texas, land of the cowboy and Long Horn steer.

I practiced yoga for several years and enjoyed it immensely. I felt more peaceful, flexible and connected with my body and inner spirit.

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The calm, meditative aspect of yoga is tremendous to combat stress and stress related issues. But besides the stress relief benefits, there are a host of other health benefits that yoga provides.

Yoga Journal has an article, 38 Health Benefits of Yoga, that discusses these benefits. See their article for more in depth information. Here’s a sampling of a few of the ways yoga can improve your life and your health.

  • Improves your flexibility
  • Builds muscle strength
  • Increases your blood flow
  • Drains your lymphs and boosts immunity
  • Lowers blood sugar
  • Relaxes your system
  • Helps you sleep deeper
  • Gives you inner strength
  • Keeps allergies and viruses at bay
  • Supports your connective tissue

See you in a bit! I’m off to dust off my neglected book of poses to see if I can restart my yoga time.

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X: X-ercise to Relieve Stress

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X: X-ERCISE

Yes, I’m fudging in looking for an ‘X’ word for the A to Z Blog Challenge.

Exercise is an important component of combating stress, something that far too many of us find in our lives. And no, it doesn’t have to be a life consuming, five days a week at the gym, working towards next triathlon exercise. A simple walk around the block (with your spouse or the family dog is even better), or even dancing around the house while you clean or cook dinner, will give you stress-reducing benefits.

The Mayo Clinic has this to say about exercise and stress:

Virtually any form of exercise, from aerobics to yoga, can act as a stress reliever. If you’re not an athlete or even if you’re out of shape, you can still make a little exercise go a long way toward stress management. Discover the connection between exercise and stress relief — and why exercise should be part of your stress management plan.

Exercise and stress relief

Exercise increases your overall health and your sense of well-being, which puts more pep in your step every day. But exercise also has some direct stress-busting benefits.

It pumps up your endorphins. Physical activity helps bump up the production of your brain’s feel-good neurotransmitters, called endorphins. Although this function is often referred to as a runner’s high, a rousing game of tennis or a nature hike also can contribute to this same feeling.

It’s meditation in motion. After a fast-paced game of racquetball or several laps in the pool, you’ll often find that you’ve forgotten the day’s irritations and concentrated only on your body’s movements.

As you begin to regularly shed your daily tensions through movement and physical activity, you may find that this focus on a single task, and the resulting energy and optimism, can help you remain calm and clear in everything you do.

It improves your mood. Regular exercise can increase self-confidence, it can relax you, and it can lower the symptoms associated with mild depression and anxiety. Exercise can also improve your sleep, which is often disrupted by stress, depression and anxiety. All of these exercise benefits can ease your stress levels and give you a sense of command over your body and your life.

Have you ever used exercise to alleviate stress in your life? Do you have a favorite exercise activity that you like?

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W: Worry Stones

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W: WORRY STONES

worry stones 3Many may be too young for this memory. Does anyone remember the ‘worry stone’ fad of the 70’s? I remember my mom getting us some worry stones. They were small polished stones with a slight indentation carved out, where you could rub your thumb across, to calm and soothe yourself.

I’ve always loved rocks, any form of rocks or stones, so naturally I thought they were magnificent.

 

Happier.com writes of the benefits of worry stones in ‘The Calming Power of Worry Stones’.

Designating some physical object with this kind of (imagined) power is a small effort that can have a major impact on our ability to acknowledge, move through, and then move beyond uncomfortable emotions. Having the ability to self-soothe is an underestimated life skill everyone should learn.

And keep in mind that a worry stone doesn’t have to be a stone at all; it can take many forms and be used in many different situations, whatever works best for the individual. Maybe it’s a bracelet to fiddle with before giving important presentations at work, or perhaps some special token to focus on during your bedtime ritual that helps melt away the stress of the day. Whatever it looks like, the important part is taking those moments to acknowledge — not ignore or deflect or invalidate — your feelings so you can go forward with clarity and composure into a calmer, happier space.

worry stones.jpgThe 70’s was a long time ago. I’ve grown up since then, yet still find myself falling back on this technique to get me through rough spots. For six years I worked at a retail position (for a nationwide employer that I won’t call out in this post). The job always had times that were more stressful than usual, especially the ‘holiday season’, which was miserable from October through January. The last year there with a new manager was the worst. I used this a lot to get me through the days without exploding. Sometimes it was a polished gemstone in my pocket, such as an agate, quartz or moonstone. Sometimes it was an old antique key. Sometimes it was a pretty glass piece I’d fused.

Whatever little goody was tucked in my jeans, it was just enough that when a difficult moment arose, I could easily put my hand in my pocket, caress the hidden touchstone, and I’d feel more grounded and centered, and I was able to shrug off the drama that surrounded me at that moment.

Try it and see. Is there a little special something laying around on your dresser or in a drawer, that will give you solace and peace when you need it?

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V: Videos about Work Stress

V: Videos about Work Stress

Here’s some good thoughts from Integration Training in the UK. Lots of good tips. The video’s short, only a little over four minutes. And the delightful British accent is fun to listen to.

 

And for a funny take on Eliminating Workplace Stress, here’s this even shorter one minute clip.

 

But no matter how awful your job can be, on the worst of days, it’s probably not this bad!

U: Understanding

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U: Understanding

The customer, or the co-worker, snaps at you. It may be more than a simple snippy reply. They may unexpectedly ‘go postal’ on you, ranting and raging with their wrath directed at you. It’s so easy to respond with your own anger, or to throw your hands up in the air and storm off.

Two factors come into play here that may help.

The first is understanding.

attitude2We don’t know what is happening in their life. A husband may be dying of cancer. They’re dealing with a parent battling the slippery slope of dementia or Alzheimer’s. They just lost their job. They got up to a flat tire, and then got a ticket on the way to the store. The possibilities are endless. It’s true, we never know what trials another person is going through.

Sometimes, if we step back and try to remember this and be understanding it gives us a different perspective that may help take the sting out of the encounter.

attitudeYes, their tribulations are not an excuse. And yes, this is a two way street. The other person also doesn’t know what problems are in your life.
The second aspect that relates to this, is that we are only in charge of our attitude. We cannot control what another person does or says. We are in control of how we react.

Understanding. Try it for one day and see if it makes a difference in your life.

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T: Treats for Good Behavior

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T: Treats for Good Behavior

gold starsI remember, from the years my boys were little, how well treats worked to encourage good behavior. When I was potty training my oldest, we had a calendar and every morning he woke up dry he got a gold star. When we worked up to a whole week, and then a whole month, there were special treats involved. I don’t remember what the treats were, as thirty years have passed since then. There were other incentives for good behavior. (Incentives sounds better than bribery, doesn’t it?) When you get your room all clean, you can have an ice cream. If you and your brother go a whole day without arguing…

This little trick isn’t just for children. It works on adults too. We can apply this technique to our own life to encourage us to develop good habits, complete projects or meet other goals, or to try to get us through difficult situations.

I used it on myself yesterday. There was a new project I was excited about and I wanted to sit down and outline the plot and develop the characters. But I had other tasks that needed to be done first. I made my list of what absolutely needed finished yesterday…and when I was done with those, my treat was that I could sit down and spend an hour on the new project.

ice creamWhen I was working full time in retail, possibly the most challenging job I’ve had in my adult life, there was one coworker that was particularly annoying. Oh, how I really wanted to open my mouth and ream her up one side and down the other. But I also knew it wouldn’t do any good. It wouldn’t change her behavior at all. All it would accomplish is spreading ill will between not only us, but our other coworkers also. And it would destroy the image of professionalism that I’d worked so hard to build. When her actions escalated and they became more difficult to ignore, I used the treat motivation. If I make it all week without exploding, I’ll treat myself to a special dessert on the weekend.

When a customer stood at the counter being extraordinarily rude, I’d take a deep breath, count to ten, and tell myself that if I didn’t lower myself to her level of interaction, I’d treat myself to a break and a walk around the parking lot.

Try it and see.

What behaviors do you want to encourage or control? What habits do you want to develop? What tasks have you been procrastinating on?

What are some treats that would motive you? You’ll want to match the level of work or commitment with the treat. Obviously, my treat for writing one overdue blog post wouldn’t be a weekend away vacation. I’d save that treat for something that required a huge amount of effort or dedication.

beach vacationOr would I? Could I give myself a weekend at the beach for finishing this one blog post? Nope, not going to happen. However…maybe for finishing the novel that’s been on the backburner for too many years…

But for now, I’m going to go publish this post (that was due yesterday) and go treat myself to that last piece of caramel cake that’s sitting in the refrigerator.

 

Friday Fun with Trisha Faye

I’m a guest at Friday Fun today. Stop by as Joselyn Vaughn tries to get find out more about me.

Joselyn Vaughn

Friday Fun…

10 Random Questions with Trisha Faye

  • Tropical Island or Cabin in the Woods?

Both please! It must be my Gemini twins. Water and earth are both necessary to my soul. They both heal and soothe and are needed at different times. Without either, I’d wither away.

  • Coffee or tea?

Definitely tea, but only if it’s either green tea or herbal. Coffee….yuck. (Sorry, coffee lovers! I’ll save it all for you.)

  • Superman or Batman?

I’d have to go with Batman. Must be all those Batman shows I watched growing up. (Although, truthfully, it was always Robin I had the crush on.)

  • Cook dinner or wash dishes?

Cook dinner, definitely.

  • Walking Dead or Once Upon a Time?

Once Upon a Time! Nothing spooky, scary, or gorey for this wimp.

  • Snow day or spring break?

Spring break, definitely! Snow days are for hibernating. I think I was a bear in a…

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S: SET IN YOUR CAR AND YELL

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S: SET IN YOUR CAR AND YELL

It works. It’s a stress reducing technique. Although, it’s not one that I’d recommend you indulge in too often.

However, one afternoon it was mighty useful for me.

I left work, angrier and more upset than I had ever, ever been. I was at my limit. The next step was probably mayhem and murder, and I didn’t want it to get that far. I pulled out of the parking lot onto the street. I made it through the red light, as I didn’t want the other driver’s to see a lunatic sitting in the car next to them, screaming. As I went through the intersection (and now had no driver’s to either side of me) I began yelling at the top of my lungs. I don’t think I’ve ever screeched so loud or so long.

About a mile down the road I went, until I had to turn for the construction detour. I gave a big sigh, my shoulders sagged in relief and…I was done. I felt immensely better. It was the pressure valve that I needed at that moment.

Of course, when I got home I could scarcely talk. (My spouse didn’t mind that part of it.) And the next day, my throat was still slightly tender, just enough to remind me of my escapades the afternoon before.

But…I made it through the day without murdering my manager, thanks to a few moments of uncharacteristic, insane behavior. Because of my yelling in the car incident, we both lived to see another day.

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